May 02nd, 2017

"In America they have somethin called a national pastime or baseball -- Yank baseball is somethin like British cricket, except they have flies instead of crickets.  There is an irrefutable law in baseball, a universal law, and it goes a lot like this:  'Reich one!  Reich two!  Reich Three!  Three Reich’s yer rout!  No Fourth Reich, boys, not now, not friggin ever.'"  

“I witnessed French, German, Italian fellas in the South of France wearin bikini bottoms, a kind of Speedo.  I once saw a hairy Irishman in Galway wearin one of the European marble-bag things too.  The collective memory is -- to say the least -- very unsettling and extremely alien to the San Joaquin Valley chic whereupon I was weaned, um, in Libya.  The memories are difficult -- painful -- to live with…” 

“To downplay the massive separation of brow and hairline, President Trump wears an early Beatles’ hair style with long bangs.  He’s trained his eyebrows to grow in a wider swatch above his miniscule eyeballs by rigorously brushing his brows sideways -- or from brow-line upwards and towards his bangs -- I’ve heard he does this five hundred times before goin to bed every night as he is no quitter.  Of course, some people think cuz of the eyebrow-hair-thing that President Trump is hidin somethin or appears to be hidin something, which is okay with him as long as WE don’t know that it’s his forehead he’s hiding, or what’s the point of the whole hiding-the-forehead-thing anyway?”



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