"The lady was so sour that two seconds after lookin at a bunch of grapes she begat those raisins."
"Sidebar or interesting made-up folklore not in evidence:
"Hitler had a full mustache, which he whittled away, first on one side of the nose then the other trying to create precise order, or exact Nazi uniformity of lip hair on each side of said nose (schnozzle in Yiddish). He repeatedly failed at regimented order until he had just a tiny little maniacal mustache left, but equal in length on each side from the center of his nose (schnozz in Brooklynese).
"Electing to maintain this atrocious order instead of growing a better, luxuriant, and more evolved mustache Hitler re-trimmed said affectation and social blunder in the same manner ever afterwards, calling it perfect. Of course, even though all of his Nazi sycophants told him he had a Homeric mustache you’ll notice not one of them copied his mustache, not even Herman Goering and he wore jodhpurs and a man-bra.
"Hitler used to wear a lot of Aran sweaters, too, from Aran Island off the coast of Ireland, because he thought the Irish couldn’t spell Aryan correctly (a real smart Irish businesswoman told him that). Though -- back in real life -- Iran (the actual country),
meant even then as it does now: The Place of the Aryans. So, Hitler didn’t know what the hell he was talking about when he claimed that the Teutonic/Germanic tribes of ancient lore were Aryan -- he even got the swastika backwards, except when he accidentally wore his swastika-stamped underwear inside out, which Eva Braun mused was 'quite often, the silly little Nazi turnip.'
"When Hitler finally committed suicide he had given up completely on evening-up his mustache on each side of his nose (schnozzle in Yiddish) and was clean shaven."
- from a book review by Kevin O'Kendley: The Garden of the Beasts by Eric Larsen.
Charges of sexual misbehavior, or poor judgment in the commission of secure duties, have been made against presidential candidates, true or false, honorably raised or otherwise, are allegations -- hard evidence and honest testimony promote accurate journalism -- but due process (with a mantra of being innocent until proven guilty) is the vehicle of justice used in this free society to determine guilt, punishment, sentencing...
Happy Nevada and South Dakota Statehood Day (Please see Joe, Al, and Bob, The Three Almost Wise Men, in the short story section).
Please support the National Holocaust Museum/ 100 Raoul Wallenberg Place SW/ Washington DC 20024/ 202-488-0400
A carbuncle is a roiled mass of skin or a beautiful gem. The incredible gem is pictured in the logo below and at the bottom of the short story section...
Kevin O'Kendley is the owner of Carbuncle Moon, and the author of all original material -- cartoons, blogs, shorts, essays, articles -- on the website (there has been a very limited editorial input in some of my work). Quoted sources are noted. I am responsible for all posts.
Kevin O'Kendley: P.O. Box 172, Winterport, Maine, 04496, and 200 P Street, A-32, Sacramento, California, 95814, firstname.lastname@example.org.
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