 “In one of my dreams I’m drivin through the Martian countryside, just after survivin a harrowing attack of a tribe of Heathers -- unlike mermaids the creatures’ upper halves are female and their lower halves are female too -- when me and Larry pass some oopamakoopas. These things are like a combination of NFL nose tackles and the Real Wives of Beverly Hills. Larry asks me what the giant creatures are and I say: They’re oopamakoopas. They eat rocks and poop out fertilizer. Larry says: ‘That’s great. Why don’t we take them to earth, they seem very efficient.’ I answer: Because of gravity. I don’t understand how Larry doesn’t know this, uh, but I don’t want to embarrass him. I arch my left eyebrow like Jack Nicholson in The Shining -- crack a welcoming smile. However, I continue in a pedantic monotone since me and Larry are old friends: On earth the oopamakoopas eat rocks okay but because of the denser gravity differential they can only poop out statues of industrial metal drums and we have all of that kind of art that we need on earth.”
Please give to the Natural Resources Council of Maine: 3 Wade Street/ Augusta, Maine 04330/ 207-622-3101
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Kevin O'Kendley is the owner of Carbuncle Moon, and the author of all original material -- cartoons, blogs, shorts, essays, articles -- on the website (there has been a very limited editorial input in some of my work). Quoted sources are noted. I am responsible for all posts.
Kevin O'Kendley: P.O. Box 172, Winterport, Maine, 04496, and 200 P Street, A-32, Sacramento, California, 95814, ksokendley@outlook.com. Technical help is provided by an evolving computer genius, my son, Conor O'Kendley: A good kid with a great heart who can be reached at P.O. Box 172, Winterport, Maine, 04496. (Conor is in the Navy now, a swabby) Photography provided by a visual artist, my daughter, Caitlin O'Kendley: a young woman with a beautiful soul. (Caitlin is in college now, a media-journalism student) If your nonprofit is advertised on this site and you wish to have it removed please contact me at the above listed snail-mail or email address or use the contact form on the website. If you download a blog, cartoon, a short story -- or for any other reason -- and wish to donate $ to this site, its author and technical support personnel, please send donations to above listed addresses payable to Kevin O'Kendley. My family and I could use the dinero. All cartoons, blogs, and short stories are for sale. Categories |
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