“Yep, when I was a kid we grew em from puppies, you know washin machines and refrigerators, dryers, and when they were fat and all growed we sold them off to places like Sears, Maytag, Kenmore. We had a successful little appliance farm, y’know -- near Shirley Mills, Maine. Yank ingenuity.”
“It was rumored that some sailors, when slightly intoxicated, had a -- well -- a difficult time undoin the 13 buttons on the old dress uniforms to safely urinate, and sometimes had, uh, accidents. So, to modernize the Navy in the 70s, Admiral Zumwalt ordered all swabbies to wear khaki uniforms with zippers; like the Chiefs wore. However, it became apparent that, uh, with this convenience a much more serious problem developed and unwanted pregnancies skyrocketed from Hong Kong to Kansas. So the Navy went back to the old bell-bottoms.”
(both cartoons edited on 6/11)
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A carbuncle is a roiled mass of skin or a beautiful gem...
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