It was Sister Philomena that gave me some of the inside dope on childbirth. For instance (you’ll never believe this one), she told me that Uterus isn’t a planet in our solar system Uranus is. Uranus? I howled at that and so did the nuns. I can’t even write Uranus with a straight face:
The nuns were very friendly. Sister Philomena had some dice in a little change purse dangling from her rosary beads, so we played craps in a back chapel. The ladies took four weeks’ pay from me. Sister gave me two shots of Jim Beam even though I’m a Jack Daniels man. The ladies were very attractive in their uniforms I must admit, and I wondered if any of the expecting fathers ever hit on the nuns even though the women could well have been devout Catholics. And, of course, the mothers were having babies in the next room, screaming, yelling, and cussing like longshoremen “as the tortured vessels of a man’s animalistic lust.”
excerpt from: The Birth of Her Caitness by Kevin O'Kendley
A carbuncle is a roiled mass of skin or a beautiful gem. The incredible gem is pictured in the logo below and at the bottom of the short story section...
Kevin O'Kendley is the owner of Carbuncle Moon, and the author of all original material -- cartoons, blogs, shorts, essays, articles -- on the website (there has been a very limited editorial input in some of my work). Quoted sources are noted. I am responsible for all posts.
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